What is love? Beatrice and David
"A lot of divorce and separation comes down to people not being truly honest with themselves.”
David and Beatrice live together in Pasadena, California. David has lived in Los Angeles his whole life, Beatrice was born in El Salvador and moved to Los Angeles when she was five years old. They met in 2002 and have been married for fourteen years.
I couldn’t wait to speak to Beatrice and David about what makes a successful relationship and see what love means to them.
They were introduced through a mutual friend, someone that Beatrice had worked with for a long time. Beatrice said, “I had just come out of a relationship and wasn’t sure. I was finally convinced to go for lunch; it was a work lunch with lots of people.” David recalls, “We just saw each other; we didn’t even get a chance to talk.” A few days later, David called Beatrice at work, he recalls, “we ended up talking for forty-five minutes before I said you had better go and get back to work.”
David commented “I knew early on that she was the one for me, but after just a few months she stopped calling and didn’t return my calls or texts since she was uncomfortable with the situation at work. I remember I was out with my best friend driving in the car; I was talking so much about Beatrice he pulled over the car and said ‘you need my full attention’. He said to me,’ don’t worry, you’ll have a great summer, and if she calls, she calls.’ She did call on my birthday.”
Eighteen months later they were engaged whilst on holiday in Maui. What was meant to be a sunrise proposal high up at a volcano, ended up becoming a proposal inside the rental car with the heaters on after the sunrise was blocked by the clouds! Beatrice said, “I had once pointed out a ring I loved in a magazine; David had ripped the page out without me knowing and had that exact ring made for me. I was so happy and impressed.” Beatrice put David on a timeline early on in their relationship. She said, “I made my view known, to me when you find your mate, it’s simple. It’s not complicated; you know they are your soul-mate. I told him, that’s what I believe.”
Beatrice said, “I knew he was the one for me at our first dinner together. As he was bringing coffee back to the table, I could see him as my husband and us growing old together. I felt it, but I thought I was crazy. It was just the way we felt so comfortable with each other. The perfect puzzle piece I was looking for the whole time.”
Emmaleen: Can you tell us a loving story from your relationship?
David: “I have a big family, and I’ve always loved how much Beatrice values family. Like with my mom; she had a stroke six and a half years ago. Every time we visit my mom, Beatrice does whatever she can to help her. Beatrice got to know my mom well before it happened, but now she needs a lot of care. My mom sees Beatrice as a daughter, and she sees my mom as a mother. It says a lot about our relationship. My sisters and brothers see Beatrice as a sister too.”
Beatrice: “I was preparing to give birth, I had a plan, and I wanted to follow it accordingly. I held David accountable for it. The nurse commented that we were like ‘love birds’. It was so calm, and there was no yelling, he focused on me the whole time, I don’t think I would have been able to do it without him. We have amazing support for each other and a deep connection; we know we can count on each other no matter what.”
What is the key to a happy relationship?
Beatrice: “Being yourself no matter what. Being patient; life gives you curveballs but it’s about being thankful and being there for one another.”
David: “Respect, communication is very big, as is honesty. I think a lot of divorce and separation comes down to people not being truly honest with themselves, maybe they overlooked that. It takes work too, works together, it’s not always easy as challenges can come up.
What is Love?
Beatrice: “Love is a feeling. When you find the right person, you can’t control it. It is looking forward to coming home to that person; it’s sharing your feelings and being comfortable. When David goes away on a trip, I am still excited to see him when he gets home.”
David: “Contentment, fulfillment, and peace. Like, when we go away on vacation, we never want it to end.”
So what is their advice to anyone looking for love?
Beatrice: “A friend recently asked me this question. Love is hard to find, but when you do find it, you must accept the person. Sometimes we force it and look in the wrong places. Love isn’t complicated, there is no drama. It is a feeling of emotion that is there all the time.
David: “Be open to meeting somebody. You have to go and talk to people; it comes easily when it’s the right person. Be honest, everything is always really great in the beginning. It is important to develop a relationship and not to rush into it.
Beatrice: “It is important not to settle, decide the certain qualities that you want and not settle. There is someone out there for everyone, it comes at different times, it doesn’t always come when you are looking for it.
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